The 4 AM Blues...

At 11:30 PM I was having conversations with my 10-year old about elephant seals, because she couldn't go to sleep. (She & her sister have a temporary bed-situation happening on the floor right beside me & the Mr. You see, we are having a slumber party of sorts. The air conditioning had gone out earlier in the evening. It is a steamy 87 degrees up in here. And since it will be morning before the air gets fixed, the least hottest place in the house is the grown-ups' room. Needless to say, it will be an unromantic evening.) For a few minutes Pazely & I passed the time by describing the features of this large-nosed, oceangoing, earless seal. And then she was quiet. Maybe because the Mr. hushed us. (He has to get up early in the morning.) But what he doesn't understand, you see, is that my littlest little & I are of The Order of the Night Owl. We are charter members. I have the paperwork & everything to prove it. (Hashtag not really.) You can't do this to us. We have rights. And responsibilities to uphold. And yet, she abandoned me. Just like that...

It's now 3:12. Everyone is asleep. Except me.
I'm hot. Too hot to sleep.
I am literally reclining in a warm oven.
The Mr. just touched me. DON'T. TOUCH. ME. Ain't gonna happen.
No matter how tired I am, I just can't get to sleep. Worst feeling ever. Like, I've had insomnia before, but this is insomnia inferno. So not only am I cranky about the fact that I can't sleep, but I am grumpy AND perspiring. Ew. Gross.

In my wait to slumber, there is lots of random stuff happening in my brain. Apparently.

• I contemplate posting this Facebook status: "Hello? Has anyone seen my ZZZzzzz's? They seem to have gotten lost." But I don't. Because I'm lazy. And hot. And when you combine lazy + hot, nothing will happen. EVER.
• I also wonder why my homegrown cucumbers are soft. They are slightly squishy to the touch after I harvest them. Note to self: Google that.
• I repent for my sins.
• I douse water all over my body & feel the cooling effects of this, combined with the breeze of the dueling oscillating fans. That's right: We gots two of 'em. Boo-yah. And for some reason they are both on the same shelf oscillating in the same direction. But whatevs. ♫Extra air powerrrr!!!♫ *Sung in a metal/rock style.*
• I decide I need a really good book to read, but not too good, or else I'll get nothing done. Not now, but some other time when I'm glistening less & when the library is open.
• I have a moment of feeling sorry for myself as I watch the black plastic garbage bag, tacked partially over the window, flapping in the breeze of the powerful synchronized oscillators. Aren't I supposed to be crafty? I've had a garbage bag curtain for a year now. So chic. 
• I pray for friends with cancer, & family who are grieving, & healing in the bodies of some I know.
• I acknowledge God as The Big & The Great. And then there's me...undeserving of His love. That He should want me makes me feel at a loss for words.
• I weep for my grandmother. I miss her. And I feel like my tears are selfish. Every single one.
• I bookmark piano sheet music on my smartphone. 
• I feel rumblings in my insides & just KNOW the veggie burger & Satisfries I ate at the wonderfully air-conditioned Burger King for dinner were speaking to me now. And the pie. I had pie too. (The Mr. still thinks it's wrong that I had a veggie patty at BURGER king.)

So. Much. Randomness. All over the place.
I wish it all were as simple as seals with large noses...