First Day of School: 2014

ME: Ok, girls! Annual "first day of school" photos! Here we go!

*girls slowly put backpacks on*

ZOEY: Cheeeese!

PAZELY: Shinyyyyyyy!

ME: Yeah, you're right Paze. The light is so bright on your face. It's like your body is all normal-like, & then you have this giant glowing orb on the top of your neck. Maybe we should sit on the steps.

PAZELY: Maybe I could just move over to this side.

ME: Nope, that's not working. Your head is still glowing.

ZOEY: Mom! Are my teeth shiny?! Are they glowing?! Look how white my teeth are!

ME: They look awesome, Zoey.

PAZELY: What about my head? Does my head look awesome?

ME: *eye roll* Yes, your head looks awesome, Pazely.

PAZELY: Well, maybe I should stand over there.

ME: Well, if you stand over there, you won't be in the picture.

ZOEY: Your luminous noggin is out of frame, little one. And, somewhat ironically, I currently take the spotlight. 

ba-DUM cha!!

ZOEY: If you were taller, you wouldn't be having this problem right now.

PAZELY: Stop being so mean to me, Zoey! If I wanted to, I could probably throw fireballs at you with my fiery glowing face.

PAZELY: Maybe we should sit on the stairs, mom.

ME: (sarcastically) Great idea, Pazely. We've only got about 5 minutes left, so we need to hustle!

PAZELY: I cannot be bothered with people named "Zoey" right now. She has insulted my head & she must be stopped!

ME: You girls are sitting kind of far apart. Can you squeeze in together?

*both girls scoot together a wee fraction of a tiny bit closer together.*

ME: *sigh* Please, I need you to cooperate.

ZOEY: MOM! Do you realize that there is someone already sitting here?! This is Jenny. She's my imaginary friend. You remember her, don't you?

ME: ZOEY! Scoot over. Now.

ZOEY: I hope you're happy, mom. You just made me kill Jenny.

ZOEY: I can't do this anymore. This is so depressing. 6th grade awaits, mother.

PAZELY: MY turn! 

ME: I like how your hands are on your knees, Pazely.

PAZELY: And, now they're not! Woah...woah...woah! No gravity! My hands are floating!!!

PAZELY: Aaaand, now gravity is back.

PAZELY: And now they're floating again! They're floating!!!! Mom! Look! They're floating!

ME: I see that.

PAZELY: Just kidding, mom! That was just an illusion.

ME: I wondered what that was.

PAZELY: *looks to her left* What is Zoey doing, mom?

ZOEY: I'M LOOKING FOR JENNY! DO YOU SEE HER BACK THERE? DO YOU SEE HER?!

PAZELY: My. Sister. Is. So. Weird. But. What. Is. Weirder. Is. I. Think. I. See. Jenny.

ME: Let's come together as a happy family unit & take one last set of pictures, OK?

Great! 

Aw, that looks so sweet.

Oh, that's funny! Zoey's hair is falling across your forehead, Pazely. It looks like you have blond bangs. haha!

PAZELY: *looks up*

PAZELY: Oh my gosh! I LOVE it! And....I'm pretty sure I have cooties now.

ME: Last picture of the day! This is our "first day of school" JUMPY photo!! 

Woohoo!! 

♫I say JUMPY, you say PHOTO... 

♫JUMPY!!!.....

ZOEY & PAZELY: *silence*

ME: ♫JUMPY!!!...

ZOEY & PAZELY: *silence*

ME: Get ready to jump.....

OK, pause. 

I'm only going to say this because I can't help it: It looks like you're pooping.

ME: 1-2-3....Blast off!!!!

*silence*

ME: Zoey?...Pazely?

Hello?.....Anyone?

..........Jenny???.........

*crickets chirping*

♥
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To view all the First Day of School photo shoots, click HERE.